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Mar. 2nd, 2026 09:18 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
xindigosaberxI've been sticking to myself since I realized the people here will give me a room and absolutely nothing more. I still don't know why. No one's told me. I assume it's because it's personal, because if I'd done something against the rules I'd have been told about it. I've resigned myself to yet another experience since my husband died where I'm loathed and I spend my days wracking my brain and going over every single exchange trying to figure out what I did wrong.
I told my daughter about it, I didn't accuse anyone or even say what I suspected, just facts, and her response was extremely odd and troubling- she said "This isn't a dad situation, they're not talking to him and no one's told them you're smoking anything." that hasn't been said at any point by me. I'm left wondering now if that's exactly what was said to make this situation flip.
I couldn't smoke even if I wanted to, I have an asthmatic cough. I can't drink even though I used to, my liver is fragile after years of being poisoned and then getting my gallbladder removed because of a blocked bile duct. It took me years to correct and I have to be careful now- so I don't drink, smoke or imbibe anything that could wreck it. I don't even eat red meat more than a couple times a month. I try to avoid pork. I try to stick with chicken and seafood. I'm even working on cutting soda out of my diet right now. It's ridiculous to me that anyone could accuse me of something so far out of factual reasoning that anyone would believe it.
Then I remember I have PTSD and am a recluse by nature. I guess people still stigmatize the hell out of people who isolate themselves, never realizing people are WHY we isolate ourselves.
I told my daughter about it, I didn't accuse anyone or even say what I suspected, just facts, and her response was extremely odd and troubling- she said "This isn't a dad situation, they're not talking to him and no one's told them you're smoking anything." that hasn't been said at any point by me. I'm left wondering now if that's exactly what was said to make this situation flip.
I couldn't smoke even if I wanted to, I have an asthmatic cough. I can't drink even though I used to, my liver is fragile after years of being poisoned and then getting my gallbladder removed because of a blocked bile duct. It took me years to correct and I have to be careful now- so I don't drink, smoke or imbibe anything that could wreck it. I don't even eat red meat more than a couple times a month. I try to avoid pork. I try to stick with chicken and seafood. I'm even working on cutting soda out of my diet right now. It's ridiculous to me that anyone could accuse me of something so far out of factual reasoning that anyone would believe it.
Then I remember I have PTSD and am a recluse by nature. I guess people still stigmatize the hell out of people who isolate themselves, never realizing people are WHY we isolate ourselves.
